Kyorgra

Look who fell off the face of the planet again? Meeeeeeeeee.  Sorry about that.

I decided to take a biiiig step away from the internet for a while. I would look at a few sites here and there, but that was about it.  I needed to step back, breathe, and take a good long look at a lot of things.

A lot has happened while I was gone. 

My future husband, his cousin, and I struggled for several months for apartment hunting.  Either places would turn us down due to one person's credit score being slightly low, or the landlord never got back to us/showed up, or other room mates dropping out.... several times.  But at the end of last September, we finally moved into our own apartment!  We're a little further west of downtown Chicago, but its a very lovely area and we would always come out here for all the food places and the mall before the move so it works out.  We have everything that we could ever need over here too and the have all the big art/craft stores out here too.

I plan on being married here within the next couple of months.  Nothing too exciting, just going down to the courthouse and doing it that way.  Neither him or I are too big into a big flashy ceremony, not to mention we don't have the money for one even if we wanted it.  Super excited for that. Only downside is people bugging us even more for us to have kids already. Just not ready for that yet.

I've also cut out some toxic people in my life, and sadly a few of those people were family members.  They had a hard time understanding that I couldn't let people who were gone a big chunk of my life back in so easily, not to mention I was getting phone calls/text messages everyday asking what I was doing and who I was with all the time.  And if I wasn't doing something they thought I should be doing, they would scold me like I was a 2 year old.  I don't know, I just don't like being treated like I'm a child when I'm almost 24.

I'm not 100% sure when I'd be back fully on here again, so if anyone ever wants to talk I still have Discord and on there pretty much everyday.  If you need my username, feel free to ask for it and get a hold of me anytime!

I'm so horrible at updating this place e.e  So sorry.

It's been a roller coaster of things the past month.  Been out and about a lot, my birthday, and planning out traveling stuff that's happening later in the summer, and a trip downtown for a day in the next few weeks.

I ordered all of the new art supplies that I wanted and they came in a few weeks ago and I'm in love <3  I'm going to be doing some color swatches for my big watercolor pan set and my 60 set of faber-castell polychromos color pencils here in a bit, as well as getting some art done over the next few days since a game that I play with some friends is currently down for a server move and maintenance.  So keep an eye out for some new stuff here soon!

I have an art tumblr that you can see WIPs, sketches, etc. in case I forget to update here again with new stuff as well as a twitter account for art stuff as well.  Feel free to have a follow at one of those or bookmark to see what's new.
 elementaldragonart.tumblr.com/
twitter.com/ladydragonsilva

Just popping in for a bit to post a few things and give a few updates (my glasses broke a bit ago so its really hard for me to see so this will be quick).

Waiting on my tax return still (my taxes got messed up and it was not my fault) and I plan on getting a few art supplies that I've been eyeing for a good while so super excited for that.  I plan on getting the much bigger version of the watercolor pan set that I have now by Winsor and Newton.  The current set I have now is the small 12 pan while the one I plan on buying is the 45 pan set. I also plan on getting a 36 set of polychromos colored pencils from blick, a few drawing pads for just colored pencil work, and a set of colored sketch pencils.  Looking forward to trying out all of my new things here in the near future.

In case people were wondering, yes my Skype info is still the same I just can never remember to login on there and I feel afraid to bug people because I know everyone has different schedules.  If you have it, I'm most active on Discord and prefer that over skype any day.  My name on there is Kyorgra in case anyone wants to add me.

Hey guys, it's been a while (actually its been a little over a month oops). Got some updates and was able to find a chunk of time to sit down to do this.


It's been about 2 months since the tragic passing of my younger brother. I've finally gotten to the point where I don't cry everyday, a lot better since I cried for several hours everyday for the first month.  It's getting a bit easier to deal with.  I mean I still have the days where I'm pretty upset and can get really upset easily, but I'm getting there.  There hasn't been a whole bunch of updates with the investigation, the detectives haven't really talked to my parents which is upsetting.  I don't know how all of this works or how its done.  There's still a lot of anger and confusion and in the end no matter the outcome, a family has been torn apart.  But to hear the whispers of that what happened was intentional makes me see red.  I know my brother wouldn't want me to be upset and worry about everything, and I'm trying really hard for him.

I'm really hoping to get back into the art groove soon.  I have A LOT of sketches from late last year and some stuff I did a month ago laying about, also have a lot of ideas floating around in my head.  I will be getting a computer finally in a few weeks that out performs the old laptop that I had.  I'm hoping I can salvage the art programs on there, but I think the only one I'll have trouble with is photoshop which is what I use to edit colors on my drawings.  So I might have to find something to replace it and I have no idea with what at this time.  Any ideas would be great.  Now that I'll have my own computer again, I hope to be on skype a lot more often.  I hate having it on my phone.  I also have discord and if anyone wishes to add me on there as well, let me know.

The past few weeks have been really good, news wise anyway.  I got engaged on the 18th of last month and a lot of people are excited (especially since my boyfriend and I will have been dating for 8 years this june).  I think what we decided on was to get married at the court house and in like a year or 2 actually have a ceremony since we both would like to have one, money is just a bit tight right now for many reasons (but good reasons).  My boyfriend, a cousin of his, and myself are currently looking to get a house together.  House in the area I live in are really cheap and don't need a whole lot of work done to them.  I would also finally have my own room/office for art and that makes me soooo excited.  I miss having my own work space that doesn't conflict with someone else's things.  I will also be going out of the country for the first time next year for my birthday.  My boyfriend and I will be going to Cancun for a week and I can't wait to see the ocean for the first time either.  The last really good piece of news I got yesterday which I totally wasn't expecting.  I'm still paying off my student loans.  I had 3 and was able to pay one off completely last year and I'm close to paying off another one here in the next few months.  I got a call from my dad yesterday and him and mom have offered to pay the rest of my student loans off.  They both know that we're wanting to get our own place and everything and with what all happened with my brother I think made them see something different (not sure if I worded that the way I wanted too).  I was $10,000 in debt when I started making payments and on my own, I was able to bring that down by half in the 3 years I've been making payments.  They don't want me to be in debt so young and they want us to use the money for more important things.  They even offered to help with the down payment/deposit when we find a place.

Life is starting to look up and I hope that things can stay good for long time after all of this.

A week ago today I buried my little brother.  He was 16.  A freshmen in high school.  Had his own car and was driving.  He was going to go into the Air Force and become an Engineer after graduating high school.  It was all taken away from him in a single second Sunday morning at 1:30am the 15th because some punk decided to point an illegal gun in his face and pulled the trigger.

My brother was murdered.

I'm no longer a sister.  My parents no longer have a son.  I'm once again an only child.

He will never be a husband, a father, a grandfather, or an uncle.  His hopes and dreams no longer are obtainable.

I'm so angry. I'm angry at the world.  I'm angry at the killer.  I'm angry that the killer's mom gave him the damn gun.  I'm angry that this BOY wasn't MAN enough to get out of that car and walk away.  I'm angry that he claims it was an "accident" and didn't "know" the gun was loaded when he's been ILLEGALLY owning guns since i young teen.

I cry everyday.  I worry so much for my parents who have to walk by his empty room everyday.  I worry that the killer will get a slap on the wrist and go out and hurt/kill someone else.  I worry that my brother will not get the justice that he and my family deserves.  Holidays and birthdays will never be the same.

My family and our lives will never be the same.